Hosni Mubarak needs my help

I got an e-mail message from Hosni Mubarak a few days ago. I’m pretty sure it really is from him because the e-mail address is And who would claim to be named Hosni if he really wasn’t?

As you probably have heard, Hosni has fallen on hard times, what with the revolution, removal from office, prosecution, and now a stroke. The reason he got in touch is that he needs some help moving some of his money from offshore accounts to the United States.

He would have called me, but the Egyptian Security Networking is monitoring his phone calls, so he thought it was best to drop me an e-mail instead. He asked me to revert back to him immediately if I am interested in helping him with his money.

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I can’t give you any more details because this is all very hush-hush. As Hosni said, “I do not need to tell you of the absolute confidentiality which we both must have to observe as you are to help me in investing the funds in your country as my tycoon business representative.”

I’m really not sure how much help I will be able to give him. Most of my experience as a tycoon business representative has been with Nigerian finance ministers and their families. And I might not have much time for him. I’m expecting a call any day now from my close personal friend, Moammar Gadhafi.


About the Author

William Jackson is a Maryland-based freelance writer.

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Reader Comments

Mon, Sep 26, 2011

Diane, I was going to google the definition of 'sarcasm' for you, but we all know that is not a word.

Mon, Sep 26, 2011 Earth

There is an Israeli Lawyer in South Florida that is developing a project to resurface the pyramids as a tourist thing. . He is promising 30% return on investment as long as you can get another 3 people to invest, and they get three people to invest … I can get you in contact with him, though I think he is “cloistered” at the moment. I bet Hosni would like reinvesting in Egypt. LOL

Sun, Sep 25, 2011 Diana Hughes UK

Hosni actually spells his name Hosny despite what is written in the papers, etc. Nor has he had a stroke. He is suffering from heart problems and is in a military hospital being monitored. I think someone must be having you on if they truly sent such an email and nor is that an email address I am aware of in connection with him.

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